Teens and Social Media: Parental Challenges of Navigating Healthy Connections

Today's teenagers never knew a world without smartphones, the Internet and social media. And they are quite skilled at navigating through their digital devices. However, this constant exposure to social media – and any cruel content or sometimes dangerous misinformation that comes with it – presents potential risks to their mental health.

In an advisory issued last year, the U.S. Surgeon General stated that there are "ample indicators that social media can also have a profound risk of harm to the mental health and well-being of children and adolescents.” Up to 95 percent of youth ages 13-17 report using a social media platform, with more than a third saying they use social media “almost constantly,” stated the advisory.

“You've probably seen it on your own feeds,” explains Neki Mohan, the host of a new Baptist HealthTalk podcast: Teens and Social Media: Parenting in the Digital Age. “The risks, the challenges this exposure brings for children and parents alike that our parents did not have to deal with. So, how do we navigate it?”

On the podcast, Ms. Mohan interviewed two experts on this topic: Manuela Rodriguez, LMFT, a licensed marriage and family therapist and behavioral specialist with Baptist Health South Florida; and Marisa Azaret, Psy.D., licensed clinical psychologist and member of the Digital Safety Alliance at Nicklaus Children’s Hospital.

Parents need to understand if what their kids are watching online is “age appropriate,” and if they can “disconnect from the device in a healthy manner,” explains Ms. Rodriguez. “And when we see that it's transition time to turn off the phone, are they are able to regulate themselves -- put the phone down, put it away, and transition to the next step.”

Ms. Rodriguez adds that if they are “having a meltdown or a breakdown” when parents take away their device, and then parents are giving the device back, “we're now reinforcing that behavior and the child will now know – ‘I know what I got to do to get the device back.’

“So, if the child is unable to disconnect from the device in a healthy manner, it's gone too far,” said Ms. Rodriguez. “We have to take care of that in the moment, or we're going to create an unhealthy relationship with the devices. We need the devices.”

Dr. Azaret refers to a recent Pew Research Study that found 72 percent of U.S. teens said they “often or sometimes feel peaceful” when they don’t have their smartphone. “That’s 72 percent of teenagers who know the price they are paying for having a smartphone and social media,” said Dr. Azaret. “They know that they are not sleeping well. They know they should be playing outside with friends. They know they should be engaged in the community, or with families and friends.”

Teenagers need mom and dad to understand about “the anxiety of not being connected; the anxiety of maybe not getting the likes; the anxiety of not being present for your friends 24/7 -- because they feel that they need to be there 24/7.”

Dr. Azaret’s advice to parents is to talk to their kids frankly about their experiences online. “You know your kid better than anyone else. If there are changes in their behavior or if there are changes in their routines -- or if you feel that they’re withdrawing academically, doing poorly, sleeping poorly – then open the conversation. What we're doing here is inviting parents to open the conversation.”

Parents need to have these open conversations at various stages of their kids’ childhood, and shouldn’t stop when they’re ready to go to college, adds Ms. Rodriguez.

“They’re becoming young adults,” she said. “They need to know that this is not only going to impact their mental health, but job applications and internships. Supervisors, managers and recruiters are going to be looking at their social media. Your footprint on social media is going to say a lot about you. Before you post something or say something or like something, understand that this is going to have your fingerprint on it. ”